How are you coping with the stress of your divorce?

Most of us already have too much stress in our lives but if you are going through a divorce then you may be having a tough time.  The inherent change associated with divorce can also be unsettling and create feelings of uncertainty and depression.

Things to consider

No one is perfect but we often expect ourselves to handle a tough situation like a divorce with ease and deny ourselves the right to be vulnerable and imperfect.  When coping with the stress of your divorce the following tips may help:

Give yourself a break. Just because things don’t go as planned or expected doesn’t make you a failure.  Life is full of surprises, both good and bad and beating yourself up for mistakes or errors in judgment helps no one.  Learn to accept that the past can’t be changed and resolve to do better in the future.

Let it go. Fixating on what you don’t have or can’t do can leave you feeling frustrated and upset.  Resolve to let go of things that you can’t control and focus on the things that you can—this small shift in mindset can help you to feel less like a victim and more like a person in control of their own destiny.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. No one expects you to deal with everything on your own—except perhaps you.  And while your Long Island divorce attorney can certainly help you with the legal issues, sometimes it’s the emotional stress that you really need help with.  Don’t be afraid to ask friends, family, or even a professional to help you find a way through the emotional issues.  Something as simple as having a friend watch your kids for a couple of hours a week can do a lot to lessen your stress.

Try something new. Divorce changes many things such as where you live, your budget, and your schedule, which can be tough.  But a divorce also offers you an opportunity to change things you didn’t like about your old life.  If you always wanted to take ballroom dance lessons, why not try it now?  Or go back to school and get that degree you regretted giving up on when you got married.  Or take the gourmet cooking classes you wanted to try.  Learn to fill your life with activities and things you love—you’ll feel happier and less stressed and so will the people around you.

Take care of yourself. Being stressed out can depress you and can even affect your physical health adversely.  Adopt a daily exercise routine, maintain a healthy diet, and get plenty of rest.  Taking good care of yourself will help improve your outlook, increase your self esteem, and help you to deal with life’s ups and downs.

Mediation—a less stressful approach to divorce

The stress of a litigated divorce can be overwhelming and affect your life for years afterward.  Conversely, a mediated divorce can be a more positive and less stressful alternative to litigation.  An experienced Long Island divorce mediator can help you find workable solutions and begin the healing process.


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